Have you ever been stressed all day because you can’t get over something that happened in the morning? Or maybe last week?
This tendency of humans to obsess over little things is fairly common. Today we will look into some reasons as to why do we obsess.
Obsession, in simple terms mean that an idea or a thought continually preoccupies our state of mind.
We all have replayed various scenarios in our minds and wished that we had a better come back at that moment. Since we don’t have the power to recreate the situation or create a similar situation, we feel all the more stressed and powerless. When these thoughts turn more negative, it is known as rumination.
WHAT EXACTLY IS RUMINATION?
Rumination takes a situation which has caused us stress and magnifies the stress and the importance of the situation in our minds. Rumination is comprised of two separate variables: reflection and brooding. The reflection part of rumination can actually be somewhat helpful as reflecting on a problem can lead you to a solution. Also, reflecting on certain events can help you process strong emotions associated with the issue. However, rumination in general, and brooding in particular, are associated with less proactive behaviour and more of a negative mood.
SO WHY DO WE OBSESS OVER THINGS?
Whenever you start to obsess over something you automatically start to ruminate as well. It is our minds attempt to make sense and move on from a frustrating situation. However, it could also send you in a loop of frustration and stress. Here are some reasons explaining this behaviour.
NEGATIVE FRAME OF MIND
If you have a negative frame of mind, then you are more likely to obsess over little stuff. Sometimes people who obsess more also develop a more negative outlook towards life. Therefore, it works both ways, obsession could lead to negative mindset and negative mindset could lead to obsession.
Some people have self-sabotaging tendencies; therefore, they tend to take note of the smallest details of everything and obsess over the smallest detail.
Emotional distress can make us to focus on someone’s action more than normal. We tend to magnify our problems whenever we feel emotionally overwhelmed. Therefore, we tend to obsess on stuff which otherwise may not be that important.
We get into a conflict every now and then, may be with our family or our boss or our friends, disagreements can be found everywhere. When we are in disagreement with someone, we take note of the smallest actions they make and attach our own meaning to it since we believe that everything is directed towards us because of the conflict. That’s why we tend to obsess more when we are in disagreement with someone.
HOW TO GET OVER OUR OBSESSION?
If you feel you are obsessing over something then try to take your mind off it, specially when you know you can’t do anything about it. Exercise, go for a walk, watch a movie, basically do anything which comforts you and makes you focus on it instead of your obsession.
CONFRONT THE SOURCE
If you are obsessing about a person or their actions, try to talk to them and know the reasons behind their actions. It will help you get some closure and move on with your life without obsessing over them.
GIVE YOUR SELF TIME
Sometimes some situations are so impactful that even the sanest mind is obsessed about it. It’s okay to feel that way. Know that it isn’t the end of the world and with time you will get over it. Time indeed is the best healer; however, it does require patience.
KEEP AN OPEN MIND
We as humans are bound to have judgements, but sometimes we are too quick to arrive at those judgements, which does not give us enough time to understand someone’s behaviour and the little tweaks of their personality. Keep an open mind before forming any judgement and obsessing over them or their actions.
To conclude, we can say that we all obsess over little things and its alright until we get over obsession in a healthy way. If you feel like your obsession is taking over the other aspects of your life then you should definitely consult a doctor.